I Will Break Into Your Thoughts With What's Written On My Heart-SnoCore! 2/24/06-Seether et al.

I thought this one was going to piss me off, but it actually ended up being a good concert experience.

We left work a little early. Traffic was not that awful. We parked, got frisked at the door and went in. The show was at the Electric Factory. I've had many good times in there (especially New Years Eve 1999/2000, when we went to see G Love and I hooked up with this guy, Dan...I wonder what ever happened to him...Dan, if you're out there, send some love...ha ha ha), but I haven't been there in years. The Electric Factory has an over 21 lounge upstairs. Knowing that there would probably be a pretty young crowd, we B-lined for the upstairs. The old guy checking ID said, "Smile! It isn't *that* bad." I didn't even realize I wasn't smiling. I was probably still groggy from the nap I had on the way down.

We went to the bar and bought beer - Flying Fish XPA! It was good. We found these little booths with couches, tables and monitors in them. We settled back and started sending text messages in for them to put on the big screen. But they never did. Fuckers!

The first band was Halestorm. They weren't bad. The lead singer sounded like a very angry Taylor Dayne. I couldn't really see them that well, and for some reason, the monitors were not showing the show. So I don't have much to report other than they didn't suck, but didn't blow me away either. Eh.

Then Flyleaf came out. They were the real reason why I went to the show in the first place. On Christmas Eve, I heard their song "I'm So Sick" on my way to my dad's house. I could not believe the lungs on that chick. When I went home I bought the tickets. The singer is this tiny little chick. But Jesus Christ, can she scream! I really really liked them, although, I have to admit that I don't know much of their stuff. Anyway, immediately after "I'm So Sick" the video screens started working. Perfect! Now we could just lay back on the couches with the pillows, drink beer and watch the show. We didn't have to deal with people bumping into us and all that. We were away from the annoying people.

Shinedown came on. Again, I know a few of their songs, but not a lot. They were really good, too, though. The crowd loved them. The waitress had not been around in a long time, so I walked over to the bar to get another Flying Fish. While I was there, this big, old, scary looking biker dude grabbed my ass as he walked away from the bar. Oy! I made it through the rat maze and hid in the booth for the rest of the night. Later, I noticed a lot of people cleared out after Shinedown played. I don't know if it was because it was late or they came specifically for them. They played for a really long time. Towards the end, I started recognizing more of their songs.

Seether was fantastic. I'm amazed at how many of their songs I knew. I forgot about a lot of them. I've always thought that the singer sounds a lot like Kurt Cobain. I guess I'm not the only one because they played Nirvana's "Heart Shaped Box." It was really good. The angry chick from Halestorm came out and sang the female part to "Broken." They finished with "The Remedy" and did not play an encore.

We got out of there almost as easily as we got in. They were actually selling whipits in the parking lot. Even with all these concerts that I've been to in the last year, I don't think I've seen whipits in several years.

I guess I feel a little removed from the whole experience, because of being away from the crowd and not knowing a lot of the music. But I have to say, it was a really good night out. Who knew that a Seether show would be so relaxing?

In Honor of Valentine's Day - My Favorite Love Songs

In no particular order...

1. There Is A Light That Never Goes Out ~ The Smiths

Favorite Line: And if a double decker bus crashes into us, to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die

Granted, if a guy ever actually said something like that to me, I'd probably call the authorities and work on a restraining order. But there's just something about Morrissey's ability to take the saddest lyrics and put them to such happy ass music that makes me all giddy inside every time I hear him.

2. Maps ~ The Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Favorite Line: Wait - They don't love you like I love you.

Supposedly, this song was written by Karen O. when her boyfriend decided to take a job that would cause him to leave town. I love the desperation in her voice. She is clearly frustrated about him choosing something else over her, despite her deep deep feelings for him. We've all been there. You love someone so much it hurts, but they don't give a shit. They want to move to Nebraska or fuck some girl named Cassie instead. You know you'd be the best thing for them and that you totally would rock their world. But they have to go fuck up their lives. Let him go, Karen. There's someone more worthy out there.

3. Everlong ~ The Foo Fighters

Favorite Line: And I wonder, when I sing along with you, if everything could ever feel this real forever

I know that this song is probably a big sexual metaphor, but part of me envisions either that beginning part of a relationship where you're in the car together and a good song comes on. You both just spontaneously start singing out loud to it and you're laughing. Or maybe it's a road trip and you've traveled for miles and miles only picking up bad religeous or country music on the radio and then all of a sudden you find a good radio station with a great song. At any rate, it's about that excited feeling, the one you just can't bottle. The one that I wish I could describe.

4. Always Be ~ Jeffrey Gaines

Favorite Line: 'Cause with every day I love you more

I'll always remember the first time I heard this song. I was at a Jeffrey Gaines show at the Tin Angel in Philly. The song wasn't released yet. Paul and I were newly engaged and when he sang the line above Paul squeezed my hand. We were both on the same wave length that night because as soon as the show was over we both said about how we wanted that to be our song for our first dance at the wedding. Fortunately, the CD came out on time. We later learned that the song was written about woman that he saw in a magazine ad for skin cream. Who knew?

5. Movies ~ Alien Ant Farm

Favorite Line: I want you to be free, don't worry about me

Sure, it's not your typical mushy love song. But this guy loves this girl so much that he wants her to move on happily and stay friends. Just because things don't work out, that doesn't mean that they have to turn ugly between two people. I've always said that. Finally, someone knows what I mean.

6. Can't Help Falling In Love ~ Elvis Presley

Favorite Line: Take my hand, take my whole life, too

A true classic. And I always thought that was the sweetest lyric ever written, until I got married. Then I realized that taking someone's whole life is a lot more complicated that a corny song lyric. You're taking their annoying habits, their constant need to have Sports Center on, their relatives, their student loans, their pets...

7. N.F.B. (Dallabnikufesin) ~ Anthrax

Favorite Line: I never meant to hurt you or sleep with all your friends

Don't laugh. This is a great love story. Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy and girl get back together. Girl gets hit by a truck. I think the title says it all - Nice fuckin' ballad!

8. Lovesong ~ The Cure

Favorite Line: What ever words I say, I will always love you

I bought Paul a watch as a wedding gift and I was trying to think of an inscription. On the way to the jeweler, this song was on the radio. It seemed perfect. So on the back of his watch it says, "I will always love you." I hope he knows this song is the reason and not that lame song from the Bodyguard.

9. Romeo and Juliet ~ Dire Straits

Favorite Line: All I do is miss you and the way we used to be. All I do is keep the beat and bad company

There are a lot of good lines in this song, actually. It's a sweet and sad song. They fall in love and then she moves on and brushes the whole thing off like it was nothing. And there's this poor guy still stuck on her, writing pretty songs and slumming it. Tragic.

10. Show Me Heaven ~ Maria McKee

Favorite Line: Here I go, I'm shaking just like the breeze. Hey, babe, I need your hand to steady me.

Someone put this on a mix tape for me a long, long time ago. I loved the song. Then, one night years later, I was at a bar and this DJ played it. I met a guy that night that is kind of a whole other story, but we danced to that song. And even long after I stole half his wardrobe and punched holes in his waterbed, I still loved that song. I wanted it to be my wedding song but I ended up forgetting about it. I think I was just traumatized by the fact that I actually bought the "Days of Thunder" Soundtrack at FYE just to have that song on CD. This was long before the days of Napster and iTunes. The cashier flashed the CD at the other girl working there and they both snickered. I wonder if they still work at that place for minimum wage. Fuck you, bitches!

And with that, I hope you all have a very happy VD!

Michelle Kwan

I'm really disappointed that Michelle Kwan is dropping out of the Olympics.

I was hoping she'd skate and fall on her ass.

Honey, it's not our fault that none of your 3,000 skating outfits match your bronze or silver medals. That's more than most people have. They mean you're talented.

Fucking diva.

Snow Sucks and Comcast Can Bite My Ass!

I've always said it. After you are 16 and can drive, there is no use for snow. Well, not for me anyway. I don't ski or snowboard. I'm not a big fan of cold weather and falling. And that's really the only thing snow could possibly be useful for. Don't give me that shit that it's pretty. You know what's pretty? The stars you're going to see when you hit your head after falling in this shit.

Anyway, I have season tickets for the Philadelphia Wings lacrosse games. There's a snow emergency in Philly, but do you think they'd cancel the game? No. They're totally fucking us season ticket holders that live outside of the city. It's not like there's going to be any sort or walk up crowd tonight.

I'm pissed. I know the roads probably aren't so bad right now, but by the time the game is over and all the drunk people from the game leave, it's going to be disasterous. Does the league or Comcast (who owns the Whack Off Center) give a shit about those people? No.

So I'll be home watching The 40 Year Old Virgin again, drinking the left overs from my birthday and passing out. Woo hoo! My first weekend in my 30's and I'm staying home.

A list of things I'd like to accomplish before I'm 40

So now that I've been 30 for two whole days, I figure it's time to set a few goals. I'd like to:

-See Hawaii, Alaska, China and Austrailia

-Learn all six dance routines from all six of the MTV's The Grind work out videos (one down, five to go) along with the Napolean Dynamite dance. Yeah, I'm a dork.

-Read the complete works for Charles Bukowski and Hunter S. Thompson

-Start writing my novel

-Finish my MBA

-Get furnature for my deck

-Start the process of world domination

-Do a shot in every bar in Tamaqua in one night

-Clean out my room at my dad's house

-Learn how to make Red Death in a way that won't make my mouth go numb.

On the eve of my 30th birthday, let's play what have I learned...

I always thought that 30 was this magical age where you were suddenly grown up and had all this wisdom. Now that I'm here, I know that's a bunch of bullshit. But I'm going to share a bunch of things that I've learned over the years anyway.

*Always wear a beige bra under a white shirt.

*The people you love the most will be the ones that hurt you the worst because you tend to expect better things from them.

*Everyone in your life will teach you something.

*It sometimes takes years for guilt to show up. And when it catches up to you, you can't take anything back.

*The key to getting what you want from someone else is to make it as easy as possible for them to give it to you.

*If you find a snake run over on the side of the road and you nurse it back to health and give it a home, it will still bite you in the end. A snake will always be a snake. It's just his nature.

*If he cheated WITH you, he'll cheat ON you.

*There will always be people who are smarter, prettier, richer, whatever. But that doesn't take away from what you have.

*No matter how bad your day has been, someone else has it worse.

*If you value someone's presence in your life, even if they wronged you, forgive them. Life's too short.

*Always be proactive when apologizing. If the other person has to confront you, it places a double burden on them because, not only have they been wronged, but now they have to confront the issue alone.

*Don't drive a Ford Escort onto a beach on the Northern part of the Pacific Ocean. And be careful how close you get to the water, especially in late October.

*Two words - go deep

*Sometimes you catch more flies with honey. But who wants flies anyway? Idle threats can work too.

*Just because you hate people, that doesn't mean you can't love gatherings.

*If a man tells you he has a small penis, he is probably telling the truth.

*The lyrics are: "Vacation all I ever wanted/Vacation had to get away/Vacation meant to be spent alone," "Annie are you ok? Are you ok? Are you ok Annie?" and "Soy un perdedor/I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me?"

*Some of the greatest triumphs stem from the biggest disappointments.

*Gray vagina is is a condition where the "lips" get looser and start to loose color as estrogen production is less after menopause. And people try to sell creams to prevent this.

*Hall and Oats is a band that consists of Darryl Hall and John Oats. They had many hit songs in the 70's and 80's such as "Private Eyes" and "Rich Girl."

*Loving someone who doesn't love you back is as productive as nailing jello to a wall. Move on!

*Don't take pictures in the red light district. Your camera will end up in the Amstel river.

*Bob Dylan sucks live.

*Make sure your car is in park before exiting it.

*Dawn dish detergent and Formula 409 will get most stains out of anything, especially when combined.

*If you don't have time to do something right the first time, chances are you will not have time to go back and correct it later.

*Never buy a car that is a weird color or put anything on your car that will help others distinguish it is yours. You never know when you will be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

*Conversely, always do something to your luggage to distinguish that it is yours so that no one mistakenly walks away with it.

*If somone really pisses you off, the best revenge is to steal one of their shoes. What will you do with it? The same thing they will.

*Always make sure that people know exactly how much of an impact they have on your life.

And with that note, I love you all!

I'm Happy That I Woke Up This Morning - Jeffrey Gaines at the Whitaker Center 2/3/06

I've seen Jeffrey Gaines a bunch of times since I started this whole myspace thing, but I've always been afraid to do a concert recap like I do for all the other shows I go to. I guess I feel like I can't do a show like that justice. Although his music is a little different from what I usually listen to, I've been a fan for a long long time. So, here goes my attempt...

The opening act was awful. They were called The Holiday. Let me see if I can describe them. You know that willowy girl from your high school English class that was just a little too into poetry? Take her and clone her twice and that, my friends, is the Holiday. Three girls - one that plays piano, one on bongo and one with an acoustic guitar. Singer/songwriter chicks with freaky looks on their faces that make them look like they're channeling their home planet of Morphectimous. Although they were pretty girls, they sat down to play and basically did nothing to boost the energy of the place. They started with a cover of Neil Young's "Helpless" and that's about how I felt. Then, the nerdy looking guitar chick said, "This is a song about rain. It's called 'Rain.'" I decided then and there that I had to take notes to write this whole thing up. It was too bad/good to forget. They whispered to each other on stage, but didn't realize that they were whispering into the mike. They sang another song called "Hungry for Love" that sounded very very similar to "Please Come Home for Christmas." But whatever. They call themselves the Holiday, which considering how depressing holidays can be, was very appropriate. The only name that would suit them better would be Mokie Fraggle and the Fragglettes. They finished with a horrific cover of "Get Together" that had them changing the words to "Come on people now, smile on your sister..." Buh? That doesn't even rhyme. It's completely possible that the opening act from the last time I saw Jeffrey had me spoiled. Her name was Lili Anel and she was freakin' awesome. Seriously, folks, check out her stuff.

There was a brief intermission and then Jeffrey came out. He started with "Happy That," which I really like. Then he said that he was going to play his songlist in chronological order. That lasted for about four songs before the audience started yelling out requests. He played them, too.

Jeffrey is from Harrisburg, so he made a lot of references to local places that he used to play. I love when he tells stories. He talked about when he used to lay carpet and how his brother would conveniently end up with extra carpet for his apartment from some of their jobs. Then he said that he quit because he was going to miss a Cheap Trick show. I gained a whole new respect for Jeff after that. He talked about his old vinyl records that belonged to him and his siblings. He said he could never understand why his sister wrote her name on her Rick James records since it's not like anyone would ever steal them. He told a story about his producer who put on the exterior of being dumb, but just so Jeffrey would find the answers. He also mentioned that people in the coal regions will feed you chicken and waffles. I always thought that was a PA Dutch thing, not a coal cracker thing.

He started to play .38 Special's "Hold On Loosely" and the audience started singing it. He played a couple more songs including "Always Be," which was my wedding song. At that point, the bitch next to me's cell phone started ringing and I wanted to choke her. He finished with "Come Out Tonight," my current favorite and his cover of Tom Petty's "The Waiting." I'd even venture to say that I like his version of that better than Tom Petty's.

So, after a weak first act, the show went really well and I liked it very much. I'm thinking about going to see him again next month when he plays close to my hometown. If you have a chance to see him, check it out.