And ain't there one damn song that can make me break down and cry?

So yesterday, I went to the eye doctor for training for my contacts. I fucking hate my glasses and always have. I've worn them since I was two and my eyes are really weird. I'm extremely far sighted with astigmatism. I had contacts years ago, but they were gas perm. Owie!

I had no problem with the lenses once they were in. I had a hell of a time taking them out. Putting them back in? Not so bad. They were much more comfortable than the gas perm ones. They have me on a schedule to wear them that gradually increases as the week goes on.

Today? Big fucking problem. I couldn't get them in. They wouldn't stick to my eyeball. My eyelids are so tight, I can't open my eyes far enough to get them in reasonably.

I spent most of my lunch hour trying to get them in and failed miserably. I also spent another hour after work. No dice.

To make things even more complicated, I have a lot going on these next few days - a concert tomorrow night, my nephew's birthday party Saturday and a night out for Halloween Saturday night. On Monday, I'm leaving for North Carolina for a few days. My dick professor has given me an additional assignment for missing class, not to mention all the stuff I have to get done at work before I leave. I'm stressed to the point where I'm not sleeping and only eating when I remember that I have to. My mind is all over the place.

So I called the doctor. I was almost in tears. I told him I couldn't get them in. He said, "Chris, don't worry about it. You got them to enjoy yourself. Not make yourself crazy." I asked if I could postpone my schedule until I get back and he said to just call the Monday after I got back.

I hung up the phone and lost it. I just started sobbing and sobbing. I hate giving up on anything. I hate letting stress get the best of me like this. This isn't me. I can push through. I can do anything. This is just a fucking inconvenience and really bad time.

But now my eyes are too sore from crying. And that really nice bottle of Charles Krug Pinot Noir that has been begging for me to drink it since last Christmas is open.

Remember how I was handling my stress this time last year? I was a lush! See what I mean about quitting? It never resolves anything.